[feeling | courageous]
This morning I gathered all my courage, I started gathering them since Sunday, and walked into my supervisor’s room. Wanted to meet him yesterday but he was still on holiday so today was the perfect day. We research students have to submit our progress report every semester. Yes! And based on this progress report and our other meetings with our supervisors that we are given grades.
I handed him the report. A few seconds after that I told him that I am very sorry. Not that I am quitting my master’s studies but for not being faithful to my research. Yeah, you got it! I was such a beautiful liar all these while. I promised to work hard but the promises never materialized. Most of the time, I was wondering away from my goals because I just can’t see light inside this tunnel!
Many uncountable unproductive activities I did for the past two months. Also, the Chinese Apostolate is also digging away my time. All those activities and events to organize is simply making me drifting from my main goal. Not pointing my gold fingers to anyone but myself. It’s just me not being so organized.
There’s no point in seeking forgiveness if one does not resolute to be a better person. Frankly, I told him that I have decided and planned to report to him my progress once a fortnight which he willingly agreed. I thank him for not scolding me but accepted my apologies. I believe, like St Paul, everyone will at one point of their lives experience conversion(s). This is my most latest conversion, from a lazy log to a go-go-guy!
Despite the busy schedule, I will still keep writing as Brother Alvin in his text message reminds me to keep writing! There will be a follow-up program for the vocation camp which I attended by the Jesuits (click to read). Too bad, I cannot make it. Most likely there will be another one coming soon. Fingers crossed.
Talking about vocation, less and less am I experiencing it. Partly because my spiritual live is going down the slope and partly due to too many things to take care of. The only call I got these days is to get out of UTM next year, sounds great and so true!
The whole point of this post is, if you want to keep moving, P.U.S.H! Get yourself on the go by telling others your target and goal, that way you feel pressured to achieve them. I remember reading somewhere that P.U.S.H means praying until something happens. Wonderful!
Blogging to me now means a leisure activity for the night, while blog reading only during lunch hour or tea break. It is good to see drummie getting back to blogging after a one month hiatus. Really missed her posts.
So these days, I stop slacking and get real. I know my friends would be glad to see a better me.
6 comments ↓
Daniel, oww.. thanks for the surprise reading ur last few sentence.
about your post.. can relate to it very well.. been doing so many useless things…
lets try harder.. and put our best foot forward…
Research always require commitment and time on it. I believe you can do it. Hopefully, I can get out of school next year spring too..hehe.
drumsticks » You’re welcome. I was so surprised when I saw an update at my Google Reader. I was wondering how come there’s still updates from you. So I clicked the feed and found that you start blogging again. Haha! On doing so many useless things, I am a master of this.
chou-yu » Commitment, time and energy. If you graduate next year then Allen will be alone there. Haha. Planning to come back to Malaysia?
Time are tough?
Begin your day with ASAP
(Always Say A Prayer).
And when the going gets rough, PUSH
(Pray Until Something Happens).
I probally will look for job first…Allen will not be alone. I introduce him few Malaysian here, he can hangs out with them if he is free…hehe..he is very very busy lately..I felt guilty after saw him to be so hardworking and I was doing nothing…haha
Anna » PUSH ASAP. You managed to link them up. Good! I will remember.
chou-yu » Cool to hear that, I mean there are Malaysians studying in Kentucky. We know Allen well, he is always hardworking. He deserves to be nominated as the “Most Hardworking Engineer of FKA”. Hehe.
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