Difference of Cowporation Ideology in this World
TRADITIONAL CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You sell one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies and the economy grows.
You sell them and retire on the income.
AN AMERICAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You sell one and force the other to produce the milk of four cows.
You are surprised when the cow drops dead.
A FRENCH CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You go on strike, organise a riot, and block the roads, because you want three cows.
A JAPANESE CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk.
You then create clever cow cartoon images called ’Cowkimon’ and market them World-Wide.
A GERMAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month and milk themselves.
A BRITISH CORPORATION
You have two cows.
Both are mad.
An ITALIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows, but you don’t know where they are.
You break for lunch and forget about the cows.
A RUSSIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You count them and learn you have five cows.
You count them again and learn you have 42 cows.
You count them again and learn you have 2 cows.
You stop counting cows because you’re sobering up and open another bottle of vodka.
A SWISS CORPORATION
You have 5,000 cows and none of which belong to you.
You charge others for storing them.
A CHINESE CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You have 300 people milking them.
You claim full employment and high bovine productivity.
You have the newsman who reported on the numbers arrested.
AN IRAQI CORPORATION
Everyone thinks you have lots of cows.
You tell them that you have none.
No-one believes you, so they bomb you and invade your country.
You still have no cows, but at least now you are part of a Democracy….
AN IRISH CORPORATION
You have two cows…or is it three?
What matters? Aren’t you well off to have even one?
AN INDIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You worship them.
A MALAYSIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You signed a 40-year contract to supply milk at RM0.06 per litre.
Then midway through, you raised the price to RM0.60 or you cut the supply.
When the buyer agrees to the new price, you change your mind again and now want RM1.20.
The buyer decides you can keep the milk and they go look for milk that comes from recycled cows or the cow’s urine instead.
Your two cows retire together with the Prime Minister with all the shit around him.
A SINGAPOREAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
One cow-peh and one cow-bu.
My cow! I wonder why this post was submerged in my draft for two long months. It’s so long that I forgot the origin of this witty cowporation post. Now, here’s something to laugh about. Really funny. Really hilarious.
This image of two cows is courtesy of Anna Baker Art.
